The Deep Meaning of a Silence
by tessinciucy
Summary: Sometimes a silence could say much more then thousands of words... even for Marty Deeks. And Kensi will soon find out. - Ok, I wish the story could be better than this summary...


I've been writing for a while but I never found the courage to post anything. I decided to give it a try... we'll see how it'll go.

I'm Italian so English is not my first language and, in addition, the story is not edited. All mistakes (and I'm sure there will be a lot) are mine and only mine.

Now... I think the usual disclaimers are in order: Any of the characters of NCIS LA belong to me (even if I really liked that!)

I think I can go hiding beind my couch now.

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The Deep Meaning of Silence

She walked slowly towards him, insecure of her own moves. He was giving her his shoulders… but she could see that his laid back attitude was completely gone, substituted by a rigid posture, so uncommon for him.

He didn't need to look to know who was approaching him, a sad chuckle escaped from his lips "Are they still mad at me?"

"Yes, and so am I" she simply said, to cut him short.

"There was not another way out, no other option…"

"Shut up Deeks… you…" Kensi hesitated, unable to express her true emotions, her true feelings. She was too angry at the moment.

It was then that Deeks finally decided to turn around and look straight into her eyes "What? Don't tell me that Kensi Blye was worried…" he flashed one of his infamous, irresistible, smiles, that was like a ray of light after a rainy day.

"Oh shut up, you idiot!" she punched him on his injured shoulder, probably stronger than she actually wanted to do it.

"Ouch! That hurts Kensi!" Deeks protested, grimacing, but still smirking.

"Don't you dare pulling a stunt like that again… what the hell were you thinking? First running into the fire like that, then jumping down the second floor! Damn it Deeks, you could have…" once again words died in her throat.

"Come on Kensi, don't be shy" the smile was still planted on his lips, brightening his whole expression, making him look like a ten years old boy who had just get his favorite candy.

"Man, I should let Callen and Sam get you. Sam is so mad that he could kill you himself!" who was she fooling? Hiding behind the anger, she should know it was not going to work with him "No, maybe I should kill you myself, with my bare hands…"

"Wow, you were really worried, Fern! For me… I'm touched, deeply touched" he came closer, his own typical scent mixed with the smell of fire and burn, invaded her nostrils, almost inebriating her.

"It's just that… well… you're my partner and it's not that I'm willing to go through the pain of training another agent so soon. You've been pretty exhausting… I don't want to start from the beginning" she justified herself, or she pretended to justify herself.

Deeks didn't say anything, he simply stared at her, arching his brows cunningly.

"Oh hell… yes! I was worried, happy now? You're my partner, my friend…" there was an unexpected sweetness in her voice "Damn, why did you do that? Why couldn't you wait for the firemen?" the image of him running into the building on fire was still too vivid in Kensi's eyes as was the moment when she saw him jumping through the window of the second floor with the small kid into his protective arms "You've been lucky you only injured your shoulder!"

The smile disappeared from his face, his blue eyes became serious and deep "I… I simply couldn't wait. That boy needed help… he… I had to do that… I couldn't ignore his cries for help… or his mother's… I simply couldn't… I… couldn't…"

Kensi was shocked to see the tears forming in his eyes, she had been allowed to watch him with his defenses so lowered down only when he was at the hospital, after being shot, but this was not the same, this was different… completely different. This was something that came directly from his soul.

"Deeks…" she murmured, attempting to touch him, to hold his hand.

"Someone should have been there for him… for them…" he lifted his head, looking at Kensi with such a lost but at the same time, determined expression in his eyes.

She didn't know why, but she knew that in this moment Deeks was opening up to her more than he did in the year in which they had been partners. Without talking he was opening the door of his soul to her and she had never felt so close to him like she was in this very precise moment. Flashes passed in front of her eyes, of him playing with a little girl on her trampoline or of him making himself the target of tennis balls just to please a little boy who didn't remember how to play and smile. There was something in the relationship between him and kids, something deeper behind his act of playing the part of the joker to make children happy, behind his desire to help them, to be like them "You were there for him…" Kensi whispered, her anger gone completely.

As it had come, the veil of sadness matting his eyes was gone… away and his smile appeared again on his lips, goofier than ever. They were on another page of the strange book that was their friendship "And I suppose you're going to make me pay for that… aren't you?"

And with so, Kensi was aware that the mysterious Deeks, the one lost somewhere in the past had disappeared and that the Deeks she knew, the easygoing, witty big boy, impossible to shut up even when threatened, was back. She was aware that it was time to play along "Maybe a little…"

"Ok… I can live with that, but please don't leave me alone with Sam in a dark room… that man can be a little creepy!"

Kensi held a laugh, pretending to be serious, failing miserably "Don't worry" she told him playfully before punching him again on his injured shoulder "Only Kensi Bly has all the rights to hurt you… I'll protect you from Sam's ire!"

Deeks moaned holding his arm, in his eyes there wasn't any trace of joke, though. He knew Kensi had understood what had just happened between them, that she had realized that there was an entire world of hurt behind his silence; he was glad she didn't ask anything more about it. There will be a day when he will be ready to tell her everything, but not today, he was not completely ready for that… not yet at least. Today he was simply happy she was there, with him and for him "Thank you" he said.

Kensi passed one of her arms behind his back, moving it over his shoulders "You're welcome partner. Let's go. I think I can buy you a beer, you deserve it"

He stopped abruptly, staring at her not believing what his ears had just heard "Am I in big trouble? No… because… seriously… you, buying me a beer? This is a first…"

She pinched him making him jump "Shut up Deeks… and don't make me change my mind!"

"You know Kensi, you have a weird way to tell someone you were scared to death for his safety…" Deeks winked at her, teasingly.

"Deeks, don't temp your luck! Shut up and let's have this beer…"

Oh… ok, I shut up, but it's not that…"

"Deeks…!"

"Ok, ok…" he paused for a moment then sweetly, in that soft tone that always made her melt, he added "Thanks Kens…"

She sighed, inhaling deeply, before replying "Anytime partner, anytime…"

The End


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